perseverance

Break Through the Bottleneck

I wanted to check in to see how the start of your year has been. It’s interesting – some people have talked to me about starting their year like gangbusters, but more people have mentioned that they’ve struggled a little in terms of developing some momentum.

There seem to be several reasons for this:

  • the traditional “coming down” after the holiday season – the decorations are put away, there are fewer social gatherings on the calendar,
  • the exhaustion and physical illness that sometimes follow the running around that accompanies the holidays,
  • here in the Northeast, the weather has been challenging with multiple snows and crazy temperature swings that have included extreme cold that has caused people to want to hibernate rather than get out and get things done,
  • or simply the not knowing where to begin.

So here are some simple suggestions for breaking through the bottleneck:bottleneck

1) Practice self-care – Get ample sleep, proper nutrition (avoid the tendency to carb load in the winter), exercise and take your vitamins! Rest, fuel and movement are the foundation of our existence. Ensure that you are taking steps to help you feel good and maintain good health.

2) Stay in touch – Plan social outings, participate in your community, plug into your network of support. If you don’t have a support network, now is a perfect time to cultivate one!

3) New goal? Pick a place to begin – There’s no need to belabor the thought process or seek the perfect time, place or set of circumstances. Begin somewhere and the next step will become clear after that step is complete, and so on. Don’t get ready to get ready because “ready” rarely comes.

How to keep this going?!

See these steps as gifts to you with a long-term payoff (a gift that keeps on giving) rather than things you “should” be doing.

If you practice basic self-care, engage with others regularly, and take consistent steps toward achieving something that is truly important to you, you’ll have more energy, be lifted up and begin each day with the knowledge that more good “stuff” is coming your way because you are consciously paving the way for it.

Enjoy the rest of your January!

Warmly, Laurie

Laurie Leinwand is a Professional Life Coach assisting clients with a variety of personal and professional life issues. Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching encompasses Laurie’s work as a life coach for women and men, career life coach and work-life balance coach.

Some of the topics of focus in her practice as a professional life coach are assisting and supporting individuals that are stay at home parents (stay at home moms and dads are constantly forced to adapt to their current circumstances as their children grow and change) as well as those returning to work. Laurie works with people reentering the workforce who are unsure of their direction and interested in cultivating professional development skills and support.

Laurie also provides personal development assistance with regard to powerful issues such as howto make a change in your life and finding fulfillment and your life purpose. In addition, she works with clients interested in learning how to say no and setting boundaries.

Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching is located in Randolph, NJ and services the surrounding communities of Morristown, Denville, Parsippany, Florham Park and Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, though much of her coaching is done on the phone and is accessible to clients worldwide.  Laurie is a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF) and the New Jersey Professional Coaches Association (ICF-NJ).

Reaching the Finish Line

Are you one of those people that start out on a mission full throttle and as you near the finish line your energy wanes, and that end result you’ve been working so hard for perpetually feels just beyond your reach?

Then what happens? Do you give up? Do you allow yourself to become distracted (or SEEK distraction)? Do you tell yourself it wasn’t meant to be?

I posted a quote on Facebook earlier this week that said, “If we did all the things we were capable of doing we would literally astonish ourselves.” Isn’t it true?! What amazing things we could accomplish if we didn’t stall just before completion!

So how do you follow through? How do you give yourself the opportunity to astonish on a regular basis?

There are a few things that might be happening as you near the completion of a goal.

1)   You meet with greater resistance. – Things suddenly get harder and require more effort.  You start to wonder if it’s “worth it” to go to all that trouble. You discount the importance of the original goal and modify it to meet your needs at the moment.

2)   You are uncertain about what comes next. – The journey toward obtaining the goal has taken up lots of time and energy, and has dictated how you’ve operated the last long while. What do you do after completion?  That “not-knowing” can be enough to cause you to slooooow the process down, take a step backward, or even unknowingly thwart it.

3)   You fear maintaining the new normal. – Maintenance means subscribing to a new set of rules, which means there’s a limit to just sitting back, relaxing and enjoying. A different kind of effort has to be put forth, and if it isn’t, that new level of achievement is at risk of fading away. You sometimes sidestep your goals in order to avoid the loss you might feel if you are unable to maintain your results.

4)   You are intimidated by having to meet a higher standard. – You can hesitate if you know that you’ll have to work even harder next time as you raise the bar once again.

5)   You challenge your current view of yourself. – Astonishing yourself results in your being further defined by new accomplishments. This may feel at odds with how you’ve viewed yourself prior to that point.

So what do you do to combat these challenges?crossing the finish line

  • Go back to the beginning. – Take some time to reaffirm your commitment to your goal and why it was so important to you to begin with.  Keep the completion of that goal and what it means to you in the forefront of your mind.  You may want to post something (a picture representing its completion or an inspirational quote) in a place where you will see it on a regular basis so that you are constantly reminded to see it through and of the rewards that are in store for you.
  • Surrender to the possibility that awaits you. – You might not know what comes next.  However, chances are that the skills and determination that saw you through to this new destination are enough to take you even farther.  Trust that you can handle what is around the bend.
  • Enlist support in maintaining the new normal. – Chances are others will be excited about your progress and may very well want to be a part of it.  Ask for, and invest in, help in keeping the momentum going.
  • Be open to being astonished once again. – Take the opportunity to enjoy.  You have a choice to keep reaching higher, or not, and you set the time frame for that.
  • Imagine what it will be like to have already achieved your goal. – Try it on for size.  Envision it in a way that is in alignment with the values that are most important to you.  Reaching new levels of success does not need to challenge your view of yourself; allow it to enhance it.

You CAN reach what you now see as your finish line!  And I bet you can surpass it in ways you may never have imagined!

Go ASTONISH yourself!

Warmly, Laurie

P.S.  If you need some assistance with this, I encourage you to go here and sign up for a complimentary 30 minute strategy session with me so we can finally propel you toward your finish line in a powerful way.  I look forward to hearing from you!

Laurie Leinwand is a Certified Life Coach assisting clients with a variety of personal and professional life issues. Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching encompasses Laurie’s work as a life coach for women and men, career life coach and work-life balance coach.

Laurie provides personal development assistance with regard to powerful issues such as how to make a change in your life and finding fulfillment and your life purpose. In addition, she works with clients interested in learning how to say no, setting limits and boundaries, as well as balancing work and life.

Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching is located in Randolph, NJ and services the surrounding communities of Morristown, Denville, Parsippany, Florham Park and Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, though much of her coaching is done on the phone and is accessible to clients worldwide.

Spring is (Almost) Here!

It’s technically spring though it doesn’t necessarily feel like it here in NJ.  But there’s definitely something in the air.

I love the change of seasons.  It’s a way to mark the passage of time and keeps things interesting.  Things are never the same for too long.  My favorite transition is from winter to spring – I’m not really a fan of cold weather.  I love noticing buds beginning to emerge on plants and trees, and how the air smells so good, and how days over 50 degrees feel like such a treat initially.  I love being able to opt for a sweatshirt instead of a coat.  I adore how the color green begins to fill in the gray-brown spaces and how sometimes, when I’m driving, the sun hits my window at a certain angle and I feel like I might actually be getting a tan in my car.

But the spring is when I begin to sneeze, and my skin itches and I start to feel a little “funky” overall.  My body seems to say, “Here comes change and I’m not so sure about all this.”  I become more sensitive to certain foods.  My energy ebbs and flows seemingly without reason.

I’ve learned to welcome this process and liken it to change in general.  It’s uncomfortable.  My body reacts viscerally, rejecting it at first.  And then it slowly begins to familiarize itself with what is new.  Prior to change, or growth or emerging, I can feel upended, less grounded, and uncomfortable in my own skin.  But I know what beauty and excitement are in store if I simply give myself the freedom to move through this phase, rather than resist.

So now, instead of necessarily bemoaning a few of weeks of sneezy, itchy discomfort, I welcome them, knowing that warmer weather, gorgeous blooms and longer days are to follow.  And when I work toward my goals and experience something similar, professionally OR personally, I remind myself that my spring, a new phase of my own blossoming is what will come next.

Can you remember a time in your life when something fantastic happened for you?  Do you recall how you felt right before that time?  I would imagine you probably didn’t coast into those benevolent circumstances.  Chances are you experienced some sense of struggle beforehand.

Don’t fear or shy away from discomfort.  It might be signaling something amazing is right around the bend.  Happy Spring!

Warmly, Laurie

P.S.  I’d love to hear about YOUR experiences prior to a welcome change.  Was there discomfort?  Did you find any part of you resisting the newness of it, despite truly wanting it?

Laurie Leinwand, founder of  Ideas 2 Action, is a Certified Life Coach and Licensed Professional Counselor.  She works primarily with women in transitional phases of their lives, specializing in inspiring moms to rediscover who they are so they can successfully build lives for themselves outside of parenting according to THEIR needs, goals and desires.  Working with Laurie, her clients go from stuck, stressed, overwhelmed and confused to focused, empowered, motivated and fulfilled.  She helps her clients find clarity around what it is they really want, identify true obstacles, develop strategies for overcoming them, and ultimately reach their goals due to increased accountability and always knowing their next steps.

Laurie also provides workshops on topics such as Jump Starting Your Life and Strategies for Saying NO, and is a co-author of an upcoming book on personal development called Catch Your Star.

If you are ready to move YOUR life forward, call Laurie at (973) 343-6287 to inquire about her coaching programs.  Her coaching is done by phone is accessible to all.

Is there a Cap on your Success?

I was coaching a client recently who had worked really hard to achieve something spectacular in her life.  She was feeling euphoric as a result of her accomplishment when she heard that someone close to her had suffered an extremely upsetting disappointment.  Her euphoria quickly began to fade.  She questioned if she was somehow responsible for her family member’s difficulties, whether she had so much favor bestowed upon her that there was none left for those around her.

This was a limiting belief of hers that needed to be challenged in order for her to continue to progress.  Otherwise, she was destined to hold herself back from her true potential, shying away from the success for which she had strived so hard.

Do you have limiting beliefs of your own?  You may not even be aware of them.  When things begin to take shape for you, when you find yourself moving substantially closer to your goals, do you ever notice yourself hesitating, putting off success or fulfillment for just a little longer?

Tune into the thought process linked to this behavior.  These are some examples of limiting beliefs:

  • I question whether I truly deserve success.
  • I am unsure I will be able to handle the next step.
  • I do not know if I can live up to new/increased expectations or responsibilities.
  • I am concerned about how others might perceive my success.
  • I question whether I have worked hard enough to earn a positive outcome.
  • Once I have achieved this goal, I will have reached my success ceiling.
  • If this is my personal pinnacle, I have nowhere to go but down.
  • If I succeed, others will fail.

If you notice that YOU have limiting beliefs that hold YOU back, be deliberate in challenging them.  Develop ‘encouraging beliefs’ that combat them.

Examples of encouraging beliefs are:

  • I deserve success as much as anybody.
  • I can handle anything as long as I am determined to do so.
  • I have the ability to learn from, and embrace, new challenges.
  • I have worked hard to achieve my goals.
  • When I succeed, I can serve as a model to others to do the same.
  • There is plenty success to go around.
  • There will always be new goals I can choose to pursue.

Do not put a cap on your own success.  Take ownership of all that is good in your life and all the good you have yet to receive.  Put the cap on your limiting beliefs and step fully into your success.

Warmly, Laurie

P.S. Which encouraging belief will you use to keep moving forward?  Is there one you would like to share that is not listed above?

Laurie Leinwand is a Professional Life Coach assisting clients with a variety of personal and professional life issues. Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching encompasses Laurie’s work as a life coach for women and men, career life coach and work-life balance coach.

One of her specialty areas is career life coaching for women and men transitioning between jobs or reentering the workforce.  If you are stuck in your job or career and need help in finding fulfillment and your life purpose, Laurie can help you break through and arrive at your desired destination fast and efficiently.  She also coaches clients who are stay at home parents.  Stay at home moms and dads are required to make adjustments regularly as their children grow – this can be difficult.  Laurie also works with them as they make pivotal decisions such as returning to work.

Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching is located in Randolph, NJ and services the surrounding communities of Morristown, Denville, Parsippany, Florham Park and Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, though much of her coaching is done on the phone and is accessible to clients worldwide.

What Might it Mean to Surrender

As I write this, I’m sitting in my car on the side of a local road in my town with my hazards flashing, waiting for AAA to come and “rescue” me.   Driving home from this morning’s workout, sweaty, no make-up, no hat on my crazy tied back hair head (who was I gonna see,  I was heading straight home and it’s a 10 minute car ride at most), I got a flat tire. No idea how that happened, but I’m struck by the irony that I’ve not had ANY problems with this car since I got it 6 months ago, and I took it in for service for the first time last week, and NOW I have a problem.  I know- I’m sure one has nothing to do with the other. But still…

So I sit here and wait. Initially, I think of a lot of ways to perpetuate my being pissed off. I think of how I’m hungry and have no snacks in my purse (lesson learned), and how I should always have a book in the car so I can at least be reading, and how I have so many calls to make and so much work to do and time is slipping away.

And then I decide I can try a different approach. I can surrender to the circumstances, and even try to make the best of them.

First, I acknowledge all that is “right”.  My membership with AAA is current and I have my card handy.  I have gas in my car and can run it on and off to stay warm.  My phone is charged, I’m blessed to have a smart phone on which I can check email, write notes, play games if I want to, and of course make calls.  I even have my car phone charger if my phone begins to die.  A policeman stopped for a moment to make sure I was okay.  I have no appointment for which I am late as a result of this situation.  Ahhhh….this shift to what I am grateful for, rather than what I’m angry about changes the way I feel, AND the way I behave.

I call a couple of friends to whom I owe a phone call.  Neither is available, but I feel better about having reached out to say hi.  I check my email.  And then I decide to write this blog in the Notes section on my phone.  Writing is a way of owning the discomfort I feel without allowing it to control me.  I found a way to be productive, as opposed to feeling like I’m simply WAITING.

The surrendering involves me saying to myself, “there’s nothing I can do to change my current circumstances.”  However, I can change how I respond to them.  When I surrender, I relax, and when I relax, I think far more clearly.  If I’m full of frustration and anger and resentment, my capacity to problem solve and make decisions is limited.  And those feelings have a tendency to take over, reaching their tentacles far beyond the situation, extending further into my day.

When I stop RESISTING my situation, and start working within it, even finding things within it for which I am grateful, and taking notice of how I may have actually been prepared for it after all, I am much more likely to move beyond it quickly and easily.

RESISTING what I can’t control is wasted energy.  So I focus on what I AM able to do, and what I might do to feel more empowered in the face of it next time…things like learning how to change a tire myself, keeping snacks in the car, etc.

AAA is here!

AAA man (they don’t waste time introducing themselves) switched my bum tire out for the spare and I’m heading home.  I’ll deal with fixing the tire later today.

Next time you’re faced with a frustrating situation, or you’re “stuck,” think about what surrendering to it would mean.  If you let go of your resistance, could you actually end up freeing yourself?

Warmly,  Laurie

Laurie Leinwand is a Professional Life Coach assisting clients with a variety of personal and professional life issues. Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching encompasses Laurie’s work as a life coach for women and men, career life coach and work-life balance coach.

Some of the topics of focus in her practice as a professional life coach are assisting and supporting individuals that are stay at home parents (stay at home moms and dads are constantly forced to adapt to their current circumstances as their children grow and change) as well as those returning to work. Laurie works with people reentering the workforce who are unsure of their direction and interested in cultivating professional development skills and support.

Laurie also provides personal development assistance with regard to powerful issues such as howto make a change in your life and finding fulfillment and your life purpose. In addition, she works with clients interested in learning how to say no and setting boundaries.

Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching is located in Randolph, NJ and services the surrounding communities of Morristown, Denville, Parsippany, Florham Park and Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, though much of her coaching is done on the phone and is accessible to clients worldwide.  Laurie is a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF) and the New Jersey Professional Coaches Association (NJPCA).

What do you do When the Going Gets Tough?

We’ve all been through it.  Days, months, sometimes even years when it seemed as though nothing would go our way, or we felt like the odds were stacked against us, or we were just destined to stay on a path where things remained the same, despite our best efforts to make it better.

How do you approach these rough times?

People have different strategies for dealing with adversity.

Here’s what doesn’t work:

  • Hiding your head in the sand and playing the game of denial – Once you lift your head up, the situation typically remains the same.  The same obstacles that impeded your progress haven’t moved because you haven’t offered any resistance.  This is a passive approach that often leaves you feeling helpless.
  • Blaming others – This approach puts the power in other people’s hands.  Yes, sometimes, there are things that are out of your control.  The key is in figuring out what YOU can do to affect the situation and offer the greatest likelihood that you will impact things in the way that you hope to.  Blaming others promotes negativity, not often a force that moves things forward.

Here’s what works SOMETIMES:

  • Changing course – If you change course to the path of least resistance, you may not end up where you intended to be.  However, if you change course because you are learning from mistakes and gathering information that reveals another road to your goals might be more effective, than changing course might be the very thing that’s necessary to see you through.

Here’s what Sets People Apart:

  • Connecting with your community and asking for help – Other people have been through challenging times as well.  Ask those you trust to share what strategies have worked for them.  Ask people if they have resources that might be of value to you.  If you have a support system, don’t be shy about accessing it.  Chances are if YOU knew you could help someone, you would.  Why would the people you are closest to behave any differently toward you?
  • Rolling up your sleeves – Perseverance, your determination and your ability to push through what’s difficult, disappointing and what tempts you to give up, will determine the level of success you’ll ultimately enjoy.  To be successful, and make it through the rough patches to the other side, you need to not only be willing to do the things that others aren’t willing to do, you need to actually DO them!

In your journey, I guaranty the going will get tough.

How will you respond next time?

Please share your thoughts with me through the Contact Page, or by leaving your comments on my Facebook page.

Warm Regards,

Laurie

Laurie Leinwand is a Certified Professional Life Coach assisting clients with a variety of personal and professional life issues. Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching encompasses Laurie’s work as a life coach for women and men, career life coach and work-life balance coach.

Laurie provides personal development assistance with regard to powerful issues such as how to make a change in your life and finding fulfillment and your life purpose. In addition, she works with clients interested in learning how to say no, setting limits and boundaries, as well as balancing work and life.

Ideas 2 Action Life Coaching is located in Randolph, NJ and services the surrounding communities of Morristown, Denville, Parsippany, Florham Park and Mountain Lakes, New Jersey, though much of her coaching is done on the phone and is accessible to clients worldwide.

Catch Your Star
Laurie's chapter in Catch Your Star will inspire you to see CHANGE as a tool to vastly improve your life. She and 19 other experts share definitive strategies for identifying personal values and belief patterns, changing a stuck mindset and tapping into dreams and intuition. Order your autographed copy today!
Follow Me Everywhere!
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn
  • RSS Feed
An Interview with Laurie

Listen to my interview by Noomii

The Life Coach and Business Coach Experts | Noomii.com

The Coaching Experts

Recent eZine Articles
“Like Us” on Facebook!
Certified Coach Training Alliance